Imagine that you’re talking with someone, and you really get the sense that they’re judging you. That they’re looking down on you. How would that make you feel? Defensive? If nothing else, you’re not likely to be very open to sharing anything with the person.

That’s exactly how other people can feel if they think you’re judging them. If you want to get an idea of what someone really thinks, you need to ask them in a judgment-free manner. You need to gain their trust.

This is one reason why I think a lot of opinion polls give skewed results. People don’t feel comfortable sharing what they really think, so they say what they think people want to hear, or simply refuse to say anything.

Another reason to avoid judgmentalism is for your own sake. It’s awfully hard to learn something from somebody if you’re too busy looking down your nose at them. Even people who are often wrong will still sometimes be right about something.

In closing, treat other how you want to be treated. If you want to be respected, show them some respect. If you don’t want to be judged, don’t judge them. And if you want to say something to them, listen to what they have to say.