One of my car’s tires was completely shot, with the other 3 looking pretty bad too, so I ended up getting them replaced this morning. I found myself sitting in the lounge with plenty of time on my hands.

There was a TV on. I don’t know what channel, but it was showing one of those inoffensive morning shows, with hosts and such. But don’t worry, the offensiveness comes in spades. It had an insane amount of commercials. I’m thinking show-time and commercial-time were probably about equal. But it gets worse.

You couldn’t have a single commercial break without several awful campaign ads. You know the kind. Ridiculously over the top, stuffed with half-truths and outright lies. I think mere exposure to these things causes psychic damage and loss of intelligence. Producing these things is a very sad waste of a career, IMHO.

I realized that heroic action was necessary to save the dignity of the auto shop lobby, not to mention my sanity. I decisively picked up the remote control and flipped through the channel guide. Movies, news, sports. I knew none of these places were safe. I needed a real sanctuary. Kid’s programming!

I found one of Disney’s channels showing a marathon of Big City Greens. It’s a pretty amusing show, actually. Surprisingly, the proportion of commercials was low. And there was not a single political ad to be found. It was practically all about toys and other amusements. It was like I had found the promised land!

Now I realize other people might have thought I was crazy, some man-child who never quite grew up. And they’d be right on both counts. But as far as I’m concerned, I flipped that TV to a far more mature station than one serving as little more than an infomercial for two mud-flinging political contenders (I won’t bore you by identifying them). I’ll take any cartoon over that. Well, except for Cocomelon.